Sorry...this one might be kinda depressing

So do you ever feel that your life is just coming too fast and you aren't ready for it to start? Well then can I PLEASE join your club? Most days I just want to stay in my bed and not come out. I want to be excited about what's coming. I really do. I spend the majority of my days prepping and telling myself that it's going to be awesome. It's only what I've been working toward the past four years! So how come I'm not excited? I wish I had a pause button. Or can I just ask for a time out while I re-evaluate my life? Or you know what would be even better? A couple years ago for Mother's Weekend on the Saturday they had a workshop thing with different speakers. One speaker we went to talked about life and submitting our will to the Lord's. She said, wouldn't it be convenient if we got an e-mail that said what career to pursue, where we will work, who we will marry, and how we'll meet that person, and then how our life will work out? YES! I thought, and still do. Yes, that would be fabulous! So an e-mail or a letter in the mail would be absolutely fabulous.

I have had my life completely planned out since I arrived at college. I chose my major and I didn't stray from it and I will graduate in 9 semesters. I've always known exactly what to do and how I was going to do it. Now I'm clueless and I hate it. I hate not knowing what's going to happen. I would now like to plan the next four years...but that's not allowed. Why am I so confused right now? Oh yeah...it's life! I forgot for a second, okay maybe the past 2 weeks, that LIFE is happening to me. Got it.

Is this depressing? Are you all thinking, Hannah! GET A GRIP! Alright, alright. I will get a grip and stop. So guess what I'm going to do? Meditation. Yep, I am going to begin meditating every day. I have wanted to start meditating since I read Eat, Pray, Love and now for my World Religions class we have to do a personal project about a religion and I decided to learn about meditation and meditate. I'm so excited! I think that will definitely help me to relax. I will replace the almost daily cry fests with meditation. I will trade the puffy eyes and headaches for relaxation. It's going to be difficult though, because I can't turn off my mind. It is constantly going! Which is why I need to learn to control it and make it be quiet!! I started tonight and it definitely made me feel better. So yay!! Here's to meditation, Zumba, and the people close to me who will help me survive and come out on top this semester!

Thanks for listening.